The 4 Most Important Steps to Forgiving Yourself

Sometimes, it is not easy to forgive your missteps. You feel rotten when you have let yourself or someone else down. But one day, you must allow the sun to shine again.

Has it been challenging to do that?

This 4-step process can help you forgive yourself and move on with your life:

1. Confront your mistake. In all circumstances, take responsibility for your error. Come face to face with it and acknowledge where you stumbled. As painful as it might be, this is the first step to forgiving yourself.

• It is sometimes helpful to look in the mirror and say aloud what you did. It connects you with the action. It also helps you realize that it is okay to make mistakes.

• Coaching can help if the first option does not do the trick. Talking to someone else may help you release feelings tied down inside.

2. Analyze the impact. Take a moment to reflect on the outcome of your actions. Who has been affected? How badly were you or others hurt? Take it all at face value, and avoid embellishing it with undeserved emotion.

• Take the time to consider the impact outside of what you initially see. It is sometimes easy to overlook the smaller impact when the greater one is overwhelming.

3. Accept your human imperfections. Above all, be kind to yourself. Remind yourself that you are human. No one on the earth goes through life without making mistakes. However, it is important to remember that this does not excuse what happened.

• While accepting your human imperfections, take the time to identify your shortcomings. Use the opportunity to work on aspects you might want to improve. Perhaps you would like to develop certain character traits further or strengthen your skills in particular areas.

• When apologizing to yourself and others, you can point out that everybody makes mistakes, but you have learned from yours and intend not to repeat them.

4. Challenge yourself to do better. The crucial final step to self-forgiveness is challenging yourself to do better. In the previous step, you accepted your imperfections. Now, it is time to work at fixing the things you can.

• Is it that you need to learn to be nicer to others? You can work on that through conscious effort or group therapy.

• Try not to repeat the same mistake. That is one of the easiest ways to backslide and end up at square one again.

• Ask your supportive friends and family to help you on your journey. Remember that no woman is an island.

Making things right might not happen overnight. What is important is that you forgive yourself and commit to turning things around.

You are full of so much potential. That potential sits unused while you consume yourself with negative energy. Lift yourself! Come to terms with the fact that you have so much more to give the world. Chip away at the negativity until all that is left is your renewed spirit.